My Story: All Natural Water Birth with a Black Midwife

Before we got pregnant, I had always kinda had this dream of having a home birth or a water birth with a black midwife. I never really shared it with anyone but for some reason, it always called to me.I would look at youtube videos and watch in awe and wonder. It seemed so different from the births I had heard about in the hospital.  

Fast forward to me getting pregnant with our daughter. I began looking into my insurance to see whether they had a black midwife or midwives that accepted our medical coverage. To my disappointment, there were no midwives that were accepted. Neither did they accept birth at a birthing facility outside of a hospital. I was so heartbroken because I knew we didn’t want to pay thousands of dollars out of pocket to go out of the network. So unfortunately, I had to go the traditional route and get an OBGYN that was connected to a hospital. 

I did my research and found a black doctor about 10 minutes from my house. My first visit was… lackluster to say the least. The appointment was about 10 minutes or so where she asked me some very basic questions. I will say that she was mild mannered and sweet but I could always tell that she couldn’t really engage due to time constraints. I left that appointment and the next several extremely disappointed. Mind you all of this was going on in the middle of the Covid pandemic so it all just seemed very disappointing. 

Y’all this is where it gets good. Sigh. This story makes me smile every time.

I wake up randomly one early morning and I get on Facebook like just about every millennial does(lol) and I start scrolling. I keep scrolling and I come across a post that says “BCBS has added birthing centers under in-network coverage”. Y’all to this very day, I have noo idea who posted that but thank you to whoever that was.

I quickly started researching because I HAD to find out if this was true. Lo and behold it says the same thing that I saw on the website. I still couldn’t believe it so I called my insurance company to confirm.

They gave me the name of the two birthing centers that were accepted as in network coverage. One was about an hour and half away from me and the other was about 40 minutes from me. Still far for both but I was determined. 

After they confirmed the locations. I started really thinking. Will they even have a black midwife though? 

That was very important to me and my prior research on licensed midwives and birthing centers had only shown the opposite. I saw NO black midwives when I would do my searches. At this point I said, although it’s my desire to have a black midwife, I’ll just be happy to be able to have a birth outside of a hospital.

I type in the name of the birthing center and I click on the website. I scroll down to “meet the midwives” and I see two Black women. My heart probably literally stopped in that moment. I actually could not believe what I was seeing. Wayment. Not only are the midwives BOTH black but one actually OWNS the facility???!! 

I was floored to say the least. but I had one hurdle though. I was 35 weeks pregnant at this time. Yep. 35. Three.five. Like, about to give birth. Something in me told me to still call them though and so I did.

I got on the phone with one of the administrators and she asked me a few questions. Then the question came, “how many weeks are you?”.

I said “35” almost under my breath. She said “oooo, you’re far along BUT because of Covid we’re allowing late transfers”.

Wait.Huh?? 

I could have cried. Knowing myself, I probably did. 

She scheduled for me to meet with the midwives and I got to meet the two black midwives I had seen on the website. 

The two midwives that eventually became a part of my birthing team. The two Midwives I will remember forever. 

For the next 6 appointments, I met with them and they would spend about an hour(yes a whole hour) asking me questions throughout my exams. Getting to know me. Giving me prenatal advice. Natural remedies. Things I should be eating. Herbal teas to drink. It was everything I wanted and sooo much more. I remember them asking what was important to me on the day of labor. I wanted low lighting. Jazz music. Aromatherapy. If you have read my blog about self- care, you know those are my jam.

I won’t go into all the details about the actual day of her birth or the two weeks leading up to it because it would literally be pages but on May 17th, 2020 at 10:22am, I gave birth to Folasade Grace Babalola in the water at that birthing center. Alongside my husband, my doula who was also a black woman, and those two midwives. With low lighting, jazz music playing, and the sweet smells of aromatherapy. Oh, and all natural with no pain medicine/epidural.

Before then, I only saw what I experienced firsthand on youtube videos. How serene and calm the water looked. How calm the energy felt even through the screams of each woman. I was able to experience it that day. 

No, my labor wasn’t pain free lol. In fact, it was the most pain I’d ever felt. At one point, I thought I just wanted to give up on life so the pain would stop. With the help of my team of angels(what I like to call them) I did what I thought I couldn’t.

That day, I realized the strength of a mother. Her beauty. Her resilience. The determination to keep pushing until what has been carried is birthed. It may sound dramatic but I came out that day a different woman and I will never be the same. 

My daughter has changed my life forever. She has made me want to become the woman I’ve always wanted to be just so I can show her the way through my mistakes and successes. I was also deeply inspired to start therapy because of her. She has grown my patience and has literally has changed me for the better. 

So this is dedicated to our baby girl. One of my heartbeats. 

I hope y’all enjoyed reading this. I know I left out some details that I may expound upon in another post but I wanted to share this very special moment. 

Check Out my free Gift to you for being awesome and reading until the end! <3 yall.

Disclaimer: I celebrate all mothers and ALL births because each and every birth is a blessing. Please don’t get discouraged or even sad that you may not have had the birth experience that you wanted. This is my story. I literally was afraid every minute leading up to that day because I didn’t know anyone personally that gave birth outside of a hospital. I was full of doubt but the Most High gave me this story and I’m grateful.

With much love,

Anita B.